Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I have failed

Tonight, I went into the bathroom, only to be greeted with this:

Which (
obviously) is wrong.

So I called down the hall: "Hey ... who changed the toilet paper roll?"

Logan poked his head out of his bedroom.

"I did," he answered.

"Oh," I shrugged. I wasn't going to say anything. Really, I wasn't. But he came in to check out what I was checking out.

"Why are you doing that?" he asked as I flipped the roll so that the paper dispensed from the top of the roll. You know--
the right way.

"Doesn't it just look better?" I asked, suddenly feeling really silly for having even made an issue out of it. I mean, really--someone changed the roll when it was gone. How massive of an accomplishment is that in this house?

"Uh, no," Logan said, pulling his chin back and screwing his face into the horror of horrors!
look that he saves for ER needles and salad dressings that don't start and end with the word "ranch."

"Seriously?" I asked, eyeing the now-symmetrical profile of the roll, draped in its little covering of paper. All was once again at peace in the universe; the roll was happy.

"No," my son reiterated. "I prefer it the other way."

And that was it: the moment when I knew I had completely failed in this endeavor called parenting. Because honestly, if I have not passed on the desire to always have the paper coming out on the top of the roll, what else matters?


Deanna said...

ROFL! I'm generally ecstatic if a new roll of TP even finds it's way out of the bathroom closet to the vicinity of the toilet!! As for your mothering efforts, save your energy. Just set aside a few dollars for the premarital counseling for Logan and his future wife to have this same discussion in a few years. Or pray that he is blessed with a wife with a don't-care attitude when it comes to bathroom etiquette. ;-)

Hall Family said...

My DH and I had this same situation arise early in our marriage.
I was just happy there was toilet paper on the roll, and did not pay attention to the way it was going. My husband on the other hand felt very strongly that it should go under-it just looks better, and is easier-he said.
Now I do it his way, just because it was brought to my attention-lol!
The things we stress about!!

Beth said...

Oh, how funny! I agree 100%. TP must come from the top, not underneath. But since I am the one who replenishes the TP 95% of the time, I haven't run into too many unhappy rolls.

Luke said...

Hopefully your son will someday learn to function in real society [smile].

I remember the time when I couldn't see what the big deal was... I could get to the paper both ways and one didn't seem particularly worse than the other. I now know better, but there was a time. All that to say: There may still be hope [smile].


Vicki said...

But... HE PUT TOLIET PAPER back on the dealy hopper! You have produced a wonderful husband. (GIGGLE)d

Sarah said...

I never cared until I met dh. He likes your way. I still don't really care...and I'm just happy when someone replaces the roll. When I replace it, I do it the way dh likes it because I am nice.

Dawn Sodini said...

I'm with you sister. Especially when you have little ones who pull a little too much - it doesn't all come rolling off quite so easily. My family on the other hand is in the I don't care category. Have a blessed day!!!

The Hayes Zoo said...


But seriously - as much as I love my child, the day he even NOTICES that the toilet paper roll is gone and needs to be replaced, I will dance for joy - no matter which way it goes.

Your son's wife will someday rise and call you blessed. :)

Anonymous said...

LOL! I'm with you!

Now at my mom's house she folds it into a cute little triangle too.

At least he put a new roll on!

Anonymous said...

I'm with Logan...I like the paper to roll out from the bottom. It is also harder for little ones to spin it all off really fast that way...

Anonymous said...


Benny said...

I'm glad I'm not the only TP fanatic out there. My personal observation is that most people who care at all prefer it over the top... and then there are those who don't care. But I have met very few people who prefer it under the bottom. Which tells me that over the top is the widely accepted "proper" way to do it. ;o) Just my own personal thought there.


Deborah said...

Okay...I DO care, and the right way is the way your son put it! I'd be so proud if he was my boy! LOL

Hilary said...

I'm an "under" gal, myself... and a pretty adamant one. :) But if any one of my family members ever change a roll, I can certainly turn it around while I sit... because I know they'll never put in the effort to switch it BACK!

SevenSmiths said...

LOL! I also just want mine to change a roll--and to tell me when a bathroom has run completely out of toilet paper! And to let me know when someone has left water puddles on the countertop and floor. And to empty the bathroom trash can when it is overflowing. And to tell me when one has run out of toothpaste.

Your son sounds like mine, though. He thinks the only way to have a bedroom is with a dozen Lego projects going consecutively. That, to him, is order!

Jane D said...

Very good friends of ours discovered after their wedding that their spouse was putting the toilet paper on the wrong way. It was the source of many disagreement. For their 1st wedding anniversary they bought and installed a 2nd toilet paper dispenser. They have now been married over 15 years and all the bathrooms in their house have 2 dispensers. The reason they give is that their husband/wife really loves them. If it turns into an issue with your son and his future bride, offer to buy a 2nd one.

Great-Granny Grandma said...

Hmm. I'm with Logan. That's the way I always put it on.