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Monday, December 14, 2009

Blogging

Believe it or not, I started this blog with death in mind.

It's true: I started this blog because I wanted to leave something--anything--to bless my husband and children if I were to someday be tragically ripped from their lives. I was well aware then--as I am now--that my youngest children would have only the vaguest notions of me if one day I were to be simply erased from their daily routines. Yes, they'd struggle for a bit. A few weeks, a few months maybe. But eventually, the person who took over the singing, the rocking, the boo-boo kissing would replace me in their hearts and minds, and they would know nothing more of me than the snippets they were able to glean from others whose memories were longer and had deeper roots.

Just as my wee ones would forget me, I knew my husband would not. Mr. Blandings is, by nature, a piner. A lonely soul. A man who longs for closeness and connection. Without me as his earthly ballast, I am fairly certain that his period of drifting would be long and profound. Eventually, of course, he would find comfort. The Lord would not leave him to wander this life in pain or, even, without the counsel of a new friend, wife, and mother for his children. I can honestly say that this does not bother me; I am hopeful that, were I to be unable to perform the duties of wife- and motherhood, God will supply an equally capable and loving woman to step in and shepherd this family on a daily basis. She wouldn't be me, of course. But as long as she loved Jesus, loved my husband, and loved my babies, I think I'd be grateful to know that the role was being filled.

Out of this clarity, I began to write. Small things, really: This is how our day goes. This is what I'm thinking about. These are the little things that make my day, our day, feel just right. This is the big picture I am seeing. These are the places my heart is going.

Some day, you see, I wanted Mr. Blandings and my children to have a vast repository where they could visit me. Discover me all over again. And maybe, just maybe, know how deeply they were loved.

I wanted them to know that I am confident, now as ever, in the fact that the good times of this life are nothing compared to the good times to come in the next ... but oh ... I am so happy to have shared them here with each and every one of them.

I wanted them to know how much joy they have brought me.

How I have never regretted a single moment.

How my life has been all that I could have wished for ... and more.

This is why I started blogging, back in the beginning.


How about you?


7 comments:

Jamie said...

Okay, I'm taking this as a little nudge. Wow--timing is amazing sometimes. I was JUST thinking and talking to a friend about not just having a blog (which I do have) but actually blogging on it for that very purpose of having something tangible to look back on/with.
Thanks, MG.

The Hayes Zoo said...

I began our blog to document our international "LIFE" and how that clashes with my personality, perspective, and personal goals. :)

Oh - and the little detail that you can hardly mail anything from here made this a good way to let our supporters know we were alive and kicking and even working.

Beth said...

I began blogging because scrapbooking was just too much work!

I loved having a way to update our family (all were out of state, although now my mom is next door).

There is something great about having my thoughts and memories written down, because I'll read back over some my archives and laugh at things I have already forgotten about.

I only wish I had such a record from my mom, grandparents, or great-grandparents. How cool will it be for our future grandchildren to have a piece of us even when we are gone!

TexasHeather said...

I began blogging to chronicle and journal our move to Brazil, and as a way to let our family keep in touch with what was/is going on in our lives. Lately my blog has begun morphing into more of a resource for other ex-pats coming to Brazil, or folks traveling to Brazil. Still just my life, as I live it, but I'm trying to organize my Brazil posts a little better now that I'm getting traffic from some ExPat Brazil sites.
In the end, it's "just" my journal of our time here, very hodge-podge.

Luke said...

I started my first blog in college because it was hip, cool and everyone was doing it. It was also right after the "website wars" where my wife, best friend and I all created websites on our school's server and tried to best each other. So, my first blog was a place for my poetry.

Then I started one for my deep and profound thoughts.

Naturally, it never got updated.

The first blog that really stuck was my media production blog. I really wanted to help kids in any way I could, so I started dumping my knowledge onto the internet.

After a long while of doing that daily, and a shift in business culture--as well as starting the adoption process and other such stuff--I was able to convince Sonlight to hire me and I became a "professional" blogger.

~Luke

Sarah said...

I started blogging right before I met YOU. I had a miscarriage and strangely for me, I didn't want to talk about it to anyone. I wanted people to know my thoughts, but I didn't want to say them out loud. Not once. Not twice. Not 13 times. So I started my older blog and sent the link to everyone. It was therapeutic and helpful to me, and those who say they read it.

Karla @ Ramblin' Roads said...

Me? I just started blogging because I could. Never occurred to me that I needed a *good* reason for doing it! LOL!

Yes, that's our Christmas tree in today's post. No need to covet it, though. Just an ordinary tree. You can see what it really looks like in the previous post. Today's picture was taken using a special effect called "not holding the camera steady" resulting in blurred lights... which actually (and accidentally) looks kinda cool, I thought.