After reading some of the comments regarding my post on Bio Mom getting her visitation back, I realized I'm going to have to reveal a bit more of Oliver's story in order for my comment ("Is it o.k. to pray she failed?") to make sense. So here it is:
Bio Mom has documented issues that result in her being unable to understand how to care for a child of any age. I will not elaborate on this as it is a matter of privacy for both Bio Mom and Oliver. What I will say is that it was an oversight on behalf of an overworked intern that allowed her to leave the hospital with Oliver in the first place 20 mos. ago; the nurses in charge of his care went on the record voicing their disapproval by placing statements outlining their concerns in his file.
The best case scenario of outcome for Bio Mom at this point, in terms of her psychiatric evaluation, is that she is "potentially trainable." That diagnosis would mean that she would be prescribed intense parenting and life skills classes, and then re-evaluated at the end of a year.
Oliver would, meanwhile, "time out" of the system. Federal law caps the number of months a child can consistently be in state care at 18 mos. Oliver is at 14 months; Bio Mom's classes would last far longer than 12 weeks.
I am not trying to be harsh. I am simply restating the facts as they were given to me.
So my question was really more this: is it o.k. to pray that she fails, freeing Oliver from visitation that much sooner ... because to come back "borderline" simply delays the inevitable for us all.
I am very well aware of my role as a foster parent. At this point, no matter how I feel about Oliver or how he feels about me, I am little more than a full-time babysitter in the eyes of the powers that be. I understand this relationship, and I am more than willing to allow God's plan to be worked out in front of me and through me. It's all in His hands, anyhow.